▼

Apr 27, 2011

Peter's movie debut!


Friends, we all have skeletons in the closet.  Today I'd like to share one of mine.

It was a student film and I was young...well, younger than I am today.   Let's turn our clocks back to the mid-Nineteen nineties.  A dear friend has asked me to play a leading role in her final film school project.  What would you do, kind readers?  Loyal to a fault, I agreed.

Many find the resulting film, The Great Manipulator, to be dark.  This is in part due to inadequate lighting.  I won't give away the film's shocking ending but rest assured things don't end well for our heroine, Esme.  The Sound of Music this is not (though I do break into song).

Sluggish pacing, stilted dialogue, and flat-footed foreshadowing don't help matters.  But don't let me influence your opinions.  Despite it all, around our house The Great Manipulator is a cult film up there with Pink Flamingos and Plan 9 From Outer Space.  Lines like "I'm sorry you didn't sleep well," "Do you really think I'm talented?" and "Everything today is so market-driven" have become part of our secret language.

With no further delay, may I present The Great Manipulator.

 
My conscience is clear.

If you care to unburden yourself of a skeleton or two, please feel free.

38 comments:

  1. LauraApril 27, 2011 at 8:45 AM

    So, we finally see the true origin of "Cathy"!

    ReplyDelete
  2. AlyssaApril 27, 2011 at 8:47 AM

    Brilliant as usual, Peter.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Anne LApril 27, 2011 at 8:59 AM

    Priceless. :-)

    ReplyDelete
  4. Prof. S (the enchanted bobbin)April 27, 2011 at 9:05 AM

    You steal the show, Peter!

    I too was star of a friend's student film, once upon a time. (I discover a mysterious suitcase of vintage clothes and transform myself into some kind of retro-psycho.) I never did see the finished product, and cringe to think that it may be floating around somewhere....

    ReplyDelete
  5. Peter LappinApril 27, 2011 at 9:11 AM

    Yes, well, I've been cringing for years!

    ReplyDelete
  6. GinnieApril 27, 2011 at 9:25 AM

    Love, love, love. Stop cringing immediately.

    ReplyDelete
  7. cherriApril 27, 2011 at 9:37 AM

    Wow, Peter, You are beautiful!!!

    Your scream is reminiscent of Al Pacino's in The Godfather Part 3.

    Loved it - definitely a cool skeleton...

    ReplyDelete
  8. AnonymousApril 27, 2011 at 9:43 AM

    The skeletons are all yours. A cult classic and Cathy was just like a young Bette Davis. Four stars.

    ReplyDelete
  9. BeckyWApril 27, 2011 at 10:16 AM

    That was awesome. Loved it. Five stars.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Nina SuluhApril 27, 2011 at 10:19 AM

    Surely that's Cathy and not Peter. ;-)

    ReplyDelete
  11. UnknownApril 27, 2011 at 10:20 AM

    Love it.

    ReplyDelete
  12. MichelleApril 27, 2011 at 11:04 AM

    I to have been in bad films. It's so fun!

    ReplyDelete
  13. pterionApril 27, 2011 at 11:12 AM

    Fabulous!

    ReplyDelete
  14. SuzanneApril 27, 2011 at 11:14 AM

    Priceless! And now Cathy's true origins are confirmed and the haters can focus on Obama's birth certificate...oh, wait...

    ReplyDelete
  15. lwApril 27, 2011 at 11:32 AM

    I love Cathy's hairstyle in this-- very soft and pretty! And, yes, I *really* think you are talented!

    ReplyDelete
  16. AnonymousApril 27, 2011 at 11:46 AM

    Peter,

    Have you considerd a foray into public cable access??

    I did, and it was riotously thrilling.

    Testosterone

    ReplyDelete
  17. Lynne W.April 27, 2011 at 12:09 PM

    ... Not only Cathy's origins, but the link to the lace over taffeta impulses.

    ReplyDelete
  18. RegenaApril 27, 2011 at 12:22 PM

    What a fun skeleton!!

    ReplyDelete
  19. T. SedaiApril 27, 2011 at 1:01 PM

    Haha, brilliance! It totally surpasses Plan 9.

    ReplyDelete
  20. AnonymousApril 27, 2011 at 1:43 PM

    Yes, the dialog is stilted, the dream sequence ponderous, and the pacing makes 8 minutes feel like an eon, BUT the singing, costumes and make-up are brilliant! As far as skeletons go, that seems to have fabulous entertainment possibilities. Thanks for giving us a peek.

    ReplyDelete
  21. okaysofiApril 27, 2011 at 2:06 PM

    "The vessel with the pestle, has the pellet with the poison!"

    ReplyDelete
  22. AlessaApril 27, 2011 at 2:24 PM

    Sounds like fun! Too bad it doesn't play in Germany...

    ReplyDelete
  23. ShalynApril 27, 2011 at 4:12 PM

    Well, well! I can't deny any of the critiques you gave of the film, but I can honestly say I think you were by far the best thing in it!

    ReplyDelete
  24. AnonymousApril 27, 2011 at 4:18 PM

    That was HILARIOUS! Although I kept expecting vampires to come into the plot at some point (apparently, I associate luxe fabrics, lace cuffs and goblets with vampirism). Still, the final moment was a killer.

    Full disclosure: My two BFFs and I once wrote, produced and starred in a school movie about a sorority that forced its pledges to play nasty pranks on people as the price of admission. We actually got many of our classmates to star in it as well. I've been told the ancient VHS tape is still floating around that department somewhere. The horror....

    ReplyDelete
  25. ElarayApril 27, 2011 at 4:21 PM

    @ okaysofi: The flagon with the dragon has the brew that is true!!! ROFLMAO!

    ReplyDelete
  26. lorenakittyApril 27, 2011 at 4:50 PM

    Ah yes, gotta love those skeletons...the great equalizers of life.

    ReplyDelete
  27. kApril 27, 2011 at 5:08 PM

    I made it through 1:06. I wasn't sure if he was asking Cathy to keep picking her teeth, and I just didn't want to know.

    ReplyDelete
  28. AnonymousApril 27, 2011 at 5:14 PM

    Honestly? Was this an out take from "It Came From Kuchar"?

    ReplyDelete
  29. AnonymousApril 27, 2011 at 6:24 PM

    TOO funny! I just love the twist! What a fabulous skeleton!

    ReplyDelete
  30. marysewsApril 27, 2011 at 6:30 PM

    I loved it, and I knew which was you right away! 'Twas the eyes that gave it away ...

    ReplyDelete
  31. Sbb1 WellnessApril 27, 2011 at 8:02 PM

    Peter, I loved it...I so was not expecting the creepy awesome ending!

    ReplyDelete
  32. liza janeApril 27, 2011 at 8:34 PM

    That may be the most awesome thing I've seen all day. The scream is priceless!

    ReplyDelete
  33. AnonymousApril 28, 2011 at 1:28 AM

    I live vicariously through Cathy!

    ReplyDelete
  34. CleverclogsApril 28, 2011 at 8:24 AM

    Reading the tea leaves, I see Cathy's Hollywood debut. No, correction that should be BOLLYWOOD debut. Preferably in a vampire sci.fi bodice-ripper. Can't wait.

    Thanks Peter, you've made me feel better after a great laundry disaster. (Black pinstripe cotton that I swear I pre-washed bleeding all over the white cuffs and collar that took me days to get right!)

    ReplyDelete
  35. MaeApril 28, 2011 at 8:33 AM

    Well, the script and direction were...um...entertaining in their own way, but when you sang you were luminous! Like Doris Day meets Bella
    Lugosi.

    ReplyDelete
  36. Andrea CornellApril 28, 2011 at 10:07 AM

    Cathy looks "wunderschön"! It is just a pitty that I can not see the movie here in Germany.!

    ReplyDelete
  37. Heather - Dollarstorecrafts.comApril 28, 2011 at 10:07 AM

    Yep. I am listed on the IMDB for three completely awful films! Hahahah! I was set decorator for the worst movie I've never seen (I couldn't even watch it, it was so bad): Mr. Hell.

    ReplyDelete
  38. Alexus1325May 2, 2011 at 9:36 PM

    BWAHAHAHAHA!!!!

    I nearly fell out of my chair when the camera zoomed on you as a roaring kitty!!!

    ReplyDelete

Note: Only a member of this blog may post a comment.